Caught in the Undertow
by thefuturebelongs2u
Summary: It’s an ironic sight. Blair Waldorf. Queen B. Ice Queen. Always perfect. Surrounded in her perfect bathroom. Drowning in her imperfections. He doesn’t think he’s ever loved her more. Chuck/Blair COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

_Fuck_

This didn't happen. It sure as hell didn't happen to her. At least not again. Not again. Expressly not with him. She thought he was true. Guess she was wrong. _Again._

She didn't know but with in a day of the news she was back. This couldn't be happening to her. She kept telling herself this. Before she knew what she was doing she was at his door.

'Charles.' She states with no emotion in her voice.

She doesn't have any emotions not since she checked the latest post. The latest post of _fucking_ Gossip Girl. The one with the picture of him in bed with a ditzy blonde.

_Déjà__vu anyone?_

She let out a chuckle at the irony when she first saw it. A guy she _loved_ with a blonde. It was quite comical if you looked at it with humor.

'Waldorf.' He said as a look of surprise as she walked past him into his suite.

He quickly put the emotion back in check. His face showed no emotion, a mirror to hers.

'Name.' She asked slipping on the couch.

'Blair.' He says as she gives him a quick glance over.

'No.' She says with a quick roll of her eyes to show him that this hasn't effected her. 'Hers' She says blankly.

'Amelia.' He states knowing that Blair has a need to know. He knows he's blown it.

'Blonde?' She asks knowing that he knows as well as she that Blair Waldorf already knows.

'Don't worry she wasn't as good as you.' He says going to pour himself a scotch with a perfectly fake smirk on his face.

It's not that he wants to hurt Blair, it's just easier that she hates him. That she thinks he doesn't care. Though it's tearing him apart inside.

'As you in comparison to Nate.' She smirks back seeing the flicker of hurt in his eyes. A small victory in itself.

_Two can play that game Chuck. And you two are our favorite players. _

'Cut the act, Waldorf.' He growls advancing towards her. 'What do you want?' he snarls.

'_Let's take it slow, do it right._´ She repeats his words from the wedding circling him slowly. 'We sure got over fast didn't we?' She says not looking for a reply.

_Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow_

'So Chuck.' She smirks. 'What the _right _part about this?' She says crossing her arms.

'Blair.' He tries before she brushes him off.

'No.' She says finally locking eyes with his. 'Tell me.'

'I'm sorry.' She hears him breathe silently but load enough so that she can hear him. A small chuckle leaves her lips making him hang his head in shame.

_Another victory for our Queen B. _

'You're _sorry?'_ She says letting another chuckle escape her lips. 'What are you sorry for _Chuck?_' She says like a predator.

'Blair.' He says picking up some of his dignity as he picks up his gaze from the floor.

_Looks like C isn't going down without a fight. Watch out B. _

'It's not like I'm going to apologize for being Chuck Bass.' He says gaze locked with hers.

_Ow. Looks like we finally found what it takes to break the Ice Queen. Who ever knew it would be Chuck Bass? _

'Why?' She says not realising the emotions that are tearing at her insides. 'What did she have that I don't?' She says with a crack in her voice.

His eyes flutter shut for a second. The pain in her voice enough to destroy him.

_Why looking so glum C? You just won the war._

'It's not about you Blair.' He says hating that it is him that is making her feel this insecure.

'No.' She says the tears filling her eyes. 'What is it? What's wrong with me?' She says the emotion clearly filling her voice.

'Not every thing is fucking about you Blair.' Chuck says. 'Stop being so fucking full of your self.' He says hitting home. He sees the emotion and hurt quickly disapeer from her eyes. The eyes now filled with no emotion showing.

_Looks like the ice queen is back_

'Consider this goodbye.' She says before leaving the suite with a Chuck Bass who didn't seem nearly drunk enough for this.

_She swears that there's no difference between the lies and compliment. It's all the same if everbody leaves her. _

It's not that Serena didn't want to go see her best friend.

She's read the Gossip Girl. Her lip curls up in disgust and she thinks of telling Nate. Just so she won't be the only to hurt Chuck.

But she'll wait. She'll wait till she gets back to the Hamptons before going to see Blair andd the bastard that broke her heart.

She knows she should go see her now. Quickly rush back.

She just didn't want to go see her in pain.

She doesn't know what to expect. Blair does a good job of hiding her pain.

Serena was never around after Blair 'broke up' with Nate, since she was mostly the person the fights were about.

_Well looks like you're in for a surprise __S. Our Queen B isn't always icy. _

Blair Waldorf isn't called the Ice Queen for no reason.

She knows how people expect her to be.

An emotionless bitch with no heart.

She had worked hard to get that image. Thrived from it.

Closing off her self from the outside. Only letting what she wanted out.

Not letting anyone in.

She had learnt her lesson after the Nate and Serena fiasco

But

She had let Chuck in before that.

Her and Chuck had been on the same team since the beginning.

Not only had she lost her boyfriend, _lover_ whatever you wanted to call it

She had also lost her best friend.

And that hurt all more.

_And every magazine tells her she's not good enough the pictures that she sees make her cry. _

She returns home to eerie silence.

Her mothers off god knows where. It doesn't matter though. All that matters is that little perfect bathroom adjoined to her room.

Her curls fall against her face as she moves to her knees in front of that perfectly white toliet bowl.

She turns on the faucet allowing it to run. She lets out a sad laugh. Knowing it probably doesn't matter anyway.

Nobody is caring. That's the thought that throws her over the bowl.

Sticking her perfectly manicured fingers down her throat.

The one person she relied on doesn't care.

Nobody ever cared.

This is how she'll survive.

_Don't go and leave me. And Please don't drive me blind. I know you're broken. I know you broken._

Maybe Chuck shouldn't have gone to the Waldorf house.

He just couldn't get her out of her head.

She was so broken.

And he was the one that broke her.

So he need to fix her.

Once and for all.

He's not shocked when he enters her bedroom only to hear the water running.

Not shocked.

He shouldn't have this much power over her.

She shouldn't have that much power over him.

But they do and they can't do anything about it.

Not even sleeping with other people.

He turns the knob to the bathroom door quietly.

It's an ironic sight.

Blair Waldorf.

Queen B.

Ice Queen.

Always perfect.

Surrounded in her perfect bathroom.

Drowning in her imperfections.

He doesn't think he's ever loved her more

_Perfect only in her imperfections. _

………………………………………………………………

_Please Review. First GG fic. _


	2. Chapter 2

She's yearning for shelter and affection

_**She's yearning for shelter and affection**_

Blair Waldorf doesn't need anybody.

_**That she never found at home**_

The people who she had once needed

All left her

She didn't need her father.

Who left her to live with his gay lover.

She didn't need her mother

Who loved her work more than her

So Eleanor left her, for her not so secret love affair

She didn't Serena

Who had left her

After she _slept_ with her boyfriend

She didn't need Nate

Who left her.

Long before they broke up

And she sure as hell didn't need Chuck Bass

_**She is searching for a hero to walk in and save the day**_

Blair Waldorf has learned to rely on herself

The one person she can trust

The one person she's destroying.

She didn't need anybody

**That doesn't mean you don't want anybody B.**

She needs her prince charming

As a little girl she always wished for one

She always prayed for one

And when she met Nate

She thought she had it.

But then again

Prince Charming doesn't cheat on the princess

Expressly with the lady in waiting.

Who was she kidding

Serena wasn't the lady in waiting

She was

Serena had always been the princess

And she was just the second best lady in waiting

Who was kidding thinking that the prince would want her

Then the princess had gone missing

But she couldn't let the kingdom erupt

So in she stepped

Not the princess

The new Queen

Queen B

She had worked for that

Not Queen S

Queen B

She was on top

Then it crashed down

The princess returned

And the prince was lost once again

But it hadn't matter

Once she had met the king

The womanizing king

The one she loved so dear

But she had known

It wouldn't last for that long

Because she couldn't change anybody

She had tried with people before

And failed

She just didn't expect their downfall to be so soon.

But he was

Chuck Bass

After all.

Her world crashing down again

And she was pissed

He shouldn't have this much power over her

But he did

Even after he cheated on her.

She still loved him

And she hated herself for it.

He goes off and cheats on _her_

And she hates _herself _for it

It was not ironic

It was just the story of her life.

She loves people who hurt her

And hates herself for it

……………………………………………………..

She can't believe she does it

But she does.

Where was Serena?

That was all she could think about afterwards

Sure she hadn't texted her

But Serena hadn't texted her either

And she knew that Serena had seen the Gossip Girl post.

Serena still liked to be in touch

Even when she was away

Slowly pushing her espresso curl out of her face

She can't help but think

Where is her prince charming?

And if one cue she hears the door click open

She wants to know who it is

But she doesn't look up

Afraid of what they might see

Or who she might see

_**And in walks her prince charming**_

She can smell the scotch

She know who's at the door.

The one person that she wants to see the least at this moment

Her eyes flickers up to his eyes

Brown meets brown

Hers flicker back to the spot on the floor after a moment

But that moment was all it took for the boy

All it took to see the hurt and pain in her eyes

'Blair,' She hears him whisper.

They stay like that for a moment

She can feel his gaze on her

It makes all the more ashamed

'Leave,' she commands.

'No.' He states back.

She knows that he's not leaving.

Part of her is glad, the other part pissed

She would stand and make him leave

She's just too

Exhausted

Tired

Sick of fighting

'Please,' she says not wanting him to see her this weak,

This vulnerable

'Blair,' he says advancing towards her slowly.

'Stop.' She says closing her eyes

Refusing to see anything out of her fairy tale story.

'I can't leave you like this Blair.' He sighs standing over her.

'I'm fine.' She says starting to stand up.

She starts to stand

He catches her as her knees give out

'Not your smartest idea Waldorf.' He whispers into her ear holding her close.

'Let go of me Bass,' She hisses back.

'Like you can stand on your own.' He chuckles as he gently lifts her into his arms.

She doesn't say anything as he carries her to the bed. He gently sets her down taking off her shoes before pulling the blankets

'What was that?' He asks as she starts to curl up.

'Leave.' She says turning away from him.

He wants to stay, he does

He knows he's not going to be forgiven that easily.

'Bye Waldorf.'

'I hate you Bass.'

_**Don't worry this is just the beginning. This will be a Waldass. Review! **_


	3. Chapter 3

'Blair

_**I've become so numb**_

'Blair?'

Serena had only seen Blair drunk a few times

But never as drunk

Serena didn't expect to find her in a bar when she returned home

Her early return was mostly out of guilt

After 2 nights she was dying from it

Sure she told Nate it was because she needed to get some things

And return soon after but

She just needed to check on her best friend

Hoping to see Blair

The bitch

Not the drunk

So you can understand her surprise walking into a bar and seeing her best friend giving a guy a lap dance.

Blair didn't give lap dances.

That was Serena's sort of thing

She stood in shock for a minute

All she wanted was a drink

And what she got was a drunken best friend

After a minute Blair spotted her

'Serena!' She squealed jumping of the random guys lap

Getting boos in return from him and the crowd watching

'Blair,' She says grabbing her friend before she fell.

'What are you doing here?' She asks

'Oh, nothing,' she giggles. 'Just having some fun.' Winking at a random guy, she replies

'Oh yeah giving a guy a lap dance, fun.'

'Come on lets do shots!' She sequels trying to drag her best friend to the bar

'No,' Serena argued trying to stop being pulled.

'Please?' Blair pouted.

Normally Serena couldn't say no to Blair pout

But this time she had to

'Blair, time to go home,' she commands

'No,' Blair tries to pull away

Serena knows better then to let her go.

…………………………………………………………………….

_**You're an island and my ship is running ground**_

Serena could only wonder how many times Blair had did this for her

Without any complaints

Because it was what best friends did for each other

Blair would have been a fun drunk

If she didn't look so broken

Normally Serena would have cut loose with her

But tonight wasn't about Serena

It was about Blair

The girl she had clung to her

For the whole cab ride

She had some how convinced the driver to turn on the radio

Singing the whole ride home

Well at least to the hotel

Serena didn't want to leave her alone

In that big empty house

So she had brought her to her home

Once they had made it to her bedroom Blair had remembered something

'Doesn't Chuck live next door?' Blair asked sitting on Serena's bed her eyes fluttering around

'Shit.' Serena spoke.

It was too late to go to Blair's

They would just have to stay very quiet

But with a drunk Blair that turned out to be very difficult

'I'm hungry,' Blair whined playing with Serena's hair

The one she longed to have

The light golden locks

Scrimmaging through her purse Serena pulled up a second best

'Want a tick tack?'

By that time Blair was already on the phone

'Yes.' She sounded exhausted. 'Pancakes, lots!' she squeals.

'Please.' She whined into the phone. 'No I want it now!' She pouted managing to keep the phone out of Serena's reach

'I'll make it worth you're while,' She says seductively into the phone.

Serena gasps at that

Blair would never

Would she?

Obviously this wasn't her best friend.

No it was

Just the drunken one

She really needed to repay Blair some way

For taking care of her all those nights

She just hoped it wouldn't be returning the same favor

…………………………………………………………………….

'Sis.' She heard as she opened the door only to find _him _standing there

'Ordering pancakes?' He says with a smirk on his face. 'Some one trying to sober up?'

'Is he cute?' He heard a voice on the other side of the door.

He visibly tensed

This didn't go unnoticed by Serena whose eyebrow arched in suspision

'Cause if I have to make it worth his while for pancakes….' She says cutting off once she saw who was outside.

Immediately sobering up turning to her best friend

'What's he doing here?' Serena asks still standing in front of her best friend

Trying to guard her from the thing that is Chuck Bass

And what that thing does to her

'I think you forgot that it is my hotel sis.' He smirks at a fuming Serena. 'If you two were going to have a party you might of let me get rid of my guest'

It takes no time for Serena's hand to reach it's destination

His face

He realizes his mistake at that moment.

But a Bass doesn't show emotion

But maybe he did when it came to a Waldorf

'Ouch sis.' He says raising his hand to his burning check.

Serena pushes Blair inside who is still in shock

She gently closes the door before pushing Chuck up to the wall.

'Stay. Away. From. Blair.' She hisses.

Serena isn't afraid of Chuck

Maybe Chuck is a little afraid of Serena

But only when it comes to Blair

He tries to make a strike back but he nods a little but Serena knows

Because they were the same

_Were_

'Grow up Chuck.' She says before realizing her hold on him.

'Take care of her.' He says knowing Serena will do just that.

'I will.' A silent agreement

Chuck stays away

Serena fixes her

'I loved him.' He hears a sob before leaving

Hoping Serena can fix it.

'I loved you.' He hears before seeing a glass fly by and shatter in front of him.

He turns around to see Serena holding a sobbing Blair

'I _fucking_ loved you!' She says taking the vase from the cart and chucking it at him.

It breaks into a hundred pieces in front of him.

Serena sends him a glare before winning the fight with Blair and dragging her inside

In front of him he can only see the shattered pieces.

Because he sees the same thing in Blair's face

And even though Serena wants to

Even though he wants her too

She can't

Even though Blair doesn't want him too

She needs him too

And they both know it


	4. Chapter 4

I just don't want to miss you tonight

_**I just don't want to miss you tonight**_

He shouldn't have showed up at her door step

She didn't want him there

He didn't want to be there.

'What are you doing here Bass?' She sneered in his face

'What does it look like?' He replies sarcastically pushing his way into the house

'You shouldn't be here.' She says. 'Serena will be back any minute.'

'Ahh…' He says quickly making himself comfortable. 'Where has dear sis gone anyways?'

She ignores his comment, cause she knows he didn't want it answered

'What do you want Bass?' She asks again

She's standing over him

Giving herself the upper hand

She needs the control

And Chuck knows that

Control

It's a word that runs her life

That's why she would stick her perfect fingers down her perfect throat

To have control

He would let her have control

Because he knew what happen otherwise

'I just..' He starts. 'It's just. I just. I wanted to say sorry.' He repeats.

_Looks like there is a first time for everything. A Bass …… apologizing? Gone soft C? Well at least for B._

'You already said that.' She points out

'Well I just wanted to make sure you knew.' He says

'Is that all?' She asks with a roll of her eyes

She moves slightly to let him know it's time to leave

But he hasn't finished

'I didn't want to hurt you.' He says

'So you slept with someone else so you wouldn't hurt me?' She asks

_**And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming, or the moment of truth in your lies**_

'It was my father.' He suddenly blurts out

'What?' She asks confused

He would leave it at that if she wasn't Blair

This isn't something she likes he's sure

Being confused means not being in control

And she needs control

'He told me I'd become a different man.'

'Before,' she sighs as realization crosses her face

'Yeah.' He says leaving an awkward silence

Blair Waldorf doesn't do awkward

Neither does Chuck Bass

'So.' He says

'Why did you listen to him?' She asks

Her wall is breaking

Now all she wants is to know why

'I don't want to change.' He says with a sigh

His hands rub at his face

Blair knows the signs

She knows he's confused

She also knows the power his father has over him

Bart Bass

That's one of the reason of the friendship

Because his father and her mother

They are the same to their children

Chuck rebels

But secretly wants the approval from his father

Of being just the way he is

Or maybe rebelling is the way to make sure

His father's attention is on him

Blair is perfect

Never doing anything wrong

Never acting out

But perfect isn't good enough

She'd do anything to have her mother's attention on her

……………………………………………………………………………….

_**When everything meant to be broken, I want you to know who I am**_

They stay like that for a moment taking in the situation

It's Blair who talks first

It's a small whisper

But he hears it

'I never wanted you to.'

Chuck Bass leaps up

Bass don't leap

But he does

He walks over to Blair

Placing his hands on her checks

Those words

Were all it took for his lips to crash into her's

_**Review please or I'll be evil and do some mean things, lol**_

'


	5. Chapter 5

'Blair

'Blair?' Serena asks entering the house with Chinese food in hand

No answer came from the house

'Blair?'

When she had left Blair was on the couch

But the cushions left no mark of Blair ever being there

There was a mark of someone else though

A mark that made a gasp escape from the best friend's throat

A mark

That told all in its simple presence

A trademark

In their social circle,

Trademarks were popular

But no one did trademarks

Like the king and queen

And the kings was noticeable anywhere

Expressly sitting on Blair Waldorf's couch

……………………………………………………….

It's not like Blair Waldorf planned this

Actually,

She did plan that something would happen

She just didn't expect it to happen like this

She remember always wanting

Needing

Her prince charming

But

And Blair Waldorf's prince charming

Was not a prince at all

But had already

Assumed the position

Of the King

Afterall,

Every Queen needs her King

………………………………………………..

'Blair?' Serena knocked on the door to the bedroom

She slowly opened the door

Only to see the

King and his Queen

Lying on the bed

Quietly talking to each other

Paying no attention to the outside world

'My god Blair.' Serena says

Blair's head shots up

Her head slowly makes it way to the door way

Only to see the princess

Oh shit

……………………………………

'God Blair.' Serena says after Blair pulls her out of the room

'How could you?' She questions

'How could I what?' Blair asks

Her small arms crossed in front of her

A shield

Serena couldn't help but notice this

Blair didn't like to fight

But she knew how

And knew how to protect her self herself

A shield

'You know what Blair.' Serena points out

'Getting back together with Chuck?' She asks

'Yes,' Serena says exaggerated

'He _cheated_ on you.' She points out

'I know.'

Blair Waldorf cares about her friends

Her _non-judging _breakfast club

She can't help but forgive them

Not always for love

She loves them for sure

But she forgives them for herself

Because she wants them

She wanted Serena and Nate to be her friends

But she needs Chuck

Because he's her best friend

And

Because

She loves him

And it is as simple as that

……………………………………..

'Blair we don't need him,' She pleads with her best friend

'No S.' She replies

'You might not need him, but I do.'

'Why?'

'Because I love him.'

'B.' She sighs

'No S.' She says shaking her espresso curls

'I need him. I love him.'

'But he hurt you!' She tries one last time

'So did you.' She returns fire

Because she loves them both

She'd forgive them both

Because they are her besties.

………………………………………..

She gives up

Because secretly Serena knows

If she made her choose

Her or Chuck

She wouldn't be the one chosen

Cause

Lets face it

Chucks her number one

She just hopes

Blair's his

………………………………….

'Fine Blair.' Serena sighs

'But if he hurts you again I'll kill him.' She states still wanting to warn Blair

'If.' She reminds her best friend

Before she realizes it

Blair's tiny arms are wrapped around her

She guesses being number 2 isn't too bad.

/./././././././././././././././././././././././././././

Chuck doesn't know how he got so lucky

How that after everything he'd done

She had forgiven him

Cause he wouldn't have forgiven himself if she hadn't

Maybe it was luck

Chuck Bass seemed to have a lot of luck

Expressly with Blair

But no

Some people would call it something else

Something entirely different

A thing that people searched for

Yearned for

And something that he found

Without even looking for it

Some people would call it

Love

_**Reviews are love! I'm gone for the next week so no update until most likely next Sunday. Enjoy!**_


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